Vintage Romance

I am not sure if the rules of a good wife are actually that different now, but see what you think. There are a few that us girlies would not find too useful now! Truly, these were written 100 years ago.

How To Be A Good Wife In The Good Old Days 

• Don’t expect a man to see everything from a woman’s point of view. Try to put yourself in his place for a change.

• Don’t expect your husband to be an angel. You would get very tired of him if he were.

• Don’t pose as a helpless creature who can do nothing for herself; don’t drag your husband away from his office to see you across the street; don’t profess to be unable to take a journey on your own. It is true that the weak, clinging wife is often a favourite, but she is equally often a nuisance.

• Don’t despise sound common sense because he doesn’t indulge in brilliant inspirations.

• Don’t be talked down by your husband when you want to express your view on any subject. You have a right to be heard.

• Don’t nag your husband. If he won’t carry out your wishes for love of you, he certainly won’t because you nag him.

• Don’t think you can go your own way and be as happy as if you pulled in double harness. In all important matters you want to pull together.
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  Good Wife

  Don’t return to old grievances. Once the matter has been thrashed out, let it be forgotten, or at least never allude to it again.

• Don’t hesitate to inconvenience yourself to give him a den all of his own. He’s really a good fellow, and a lot of his worries will melt away if he has a place to himself for a while. When he is out, the den will be yours.

• Don’t open the door for yourself when your husband is present. He would open it for a lady guest; let him open it for you. Besides, your boys will not learn the little courtesies that count nearly so well by precept as by example.

• Don’t be satisfied to let your husband work overtime to earn money for frocks for you. Manage with fewer frocks!

• Don’t pile up money for your children. Give them the best education possible, and let them make their own way.

• Don’t exercise your passion for economy on your husband’s linen. Don’t expect him to wear his shirts and collars twice because the laundry bill is so high, and don’t grudge him a couple of handkerchiefs a day. If necessary, you can wash those yourself. Anyhow, rather economise on your own or the household washing.

• Don’t object to your husband’s life insurance. He will die none the sooner because his life is insured, and if you should unfortunately have to end your life without him, it may be a great help to you.

• Don’t greet him at the door with a catalogue of the dreadful crimes committed by servants during the day.
• Don’t let him have to search the house for you when he comes home. Listen for his latchkey and meet him on the threshold.

• Don’t omit the kiss of greeting. It cheers a man when he is tired to feel that his wife is glad to see him home.

• Don’t ‘fuss’ your husband. Mistaken attentions often annoy a man dreadfully. If he comes home late after a busy day, and has a quiet little supper alone, he doesn’t want you to jump up like a ‘jack-in the box’ with, ‘Would you like more pepper darling?’ and present him with the cruet from the opposite end of the table, when he already has one in front of him. See that everything is conveniently placed for him, and then leave the man alone until he has fed. Let him feel your sympathetic presence near him, but occupy yourself in reading, or doing needlework: anyhow, don’t ‘fuss’ him.

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  Couple 1900

  Don’t refuse to see your husband’s jokes. They may be pretty poor ones, but it won’t hurt you to smile at them.

• Don’t try to excite your husband’s jealousy by flirting with other men. You may succeed better than you want to. It is like playing with tigers and edged tools and volcanoes all in one.

• Don’t object to your husband getting a motor-cycle; merely insist that he shall buy a side-car for you at the same time.

• Don’t say golf is such a selfish game, and a married man ought to give it up.

•  Don’t take your husband on a laborious shopping expedition, and expect him to remain good-tempered throughout. If you want his advice on some special dress purchase, arrange to attend to that first, and then let him off. Men, as a rule, hate indiscriminate shopping.

• Don’t be sarcastic about your husband’s taste in dress. Be gently persuasive, and train his sense of fitness.

• Don’t refuse to entertain your husband’s friends on the ground that is a ‘bother’. Nothing pains a man more than finding only a cold welcome when he brings home a chum.

• Don’t think anything too much trouble to do for your husband’s comfort: remember he is occupied all day in working for you. Don’t be afraid of thinking and planning and working for him.

• Don’t arrange for the chimney-sweep to come on the day your husband happens to be staying at home. He won’t like either the sooty smell or the subsequent upset for cleaning purposes.

Interesting, isn’t it, so many of these you could take into our lives today, just in a different context. But of course, we are always the perfect wife or partner! 

Jo Tempest.

500 Year Old Cards

I love a game of cards with friends or my boys, and it got me wondering where the idea of cards came from.

Well, I suppose it is no surprise that playing cards originated in China, as early as the 9^th Century. Two centuries later, they were widespread across the Asian continent.

During 1368-1644, which was the Ming Dynasty, the faces on the playing cards were characters from popular novels, such as the ‘Water Margin’.

Ming Dynasty Playing Card

The ancient ‘Money’ cards, as they were known, had four suits: coins (or cash), strings of coins, myriads, and tens of myriads. It is thought that the cards may have been actual paper currency being used as the tools of gaming, as well as being played for.

The designs on the modern Mahjong tiles probably evolved from these early playing cards.

It is thought that the first deck of cards ever printed was a Chinese Domino deck, where all 21 combinations of a pair of dice were depicted. 

Playing cards first entered Europe in the late 14^th Century, probably from Mamluk in Egypt. The suits used in these cards were very similar to the Tarot card suits: Cups, Coins (also known as disks or pentacles), Staves, and Swords. These symbols are still used on traditional Spanish, Portuguese, and Italian playing cards.

Next on the scene were the Mamluk deck, of cards, made up of 52 cards with 4 different suits: coins, cups, swords, and polo sticks. Each suit contained 10 ‘Spot cards’ which were identified by the number of suit symbols they showed. Then they had a King card, a Viceroy or Deputy King, and then a Second, or Under-Deputy.

There are no surviving decks, but some did bear the names of Military officers. 

Mamluk Sultanate-Egypt-1500

What interested me, as I am now living in Turkey, was that a complete set of Mamluk cards were found by Leo Mayer in 1939 in the beautiful Topkapi Palace in Istanbul. They had been made just before 1400 but matched a deck made in the 12-13^th Century.

As I said earlier, the use of playing cards had spread all across Europe such as France, Spain, Italy, and Switzerland. These first decks were extremely expensive as they were hand made, so only the wealthy would own them.

Then printed wood-cut decks appeared in the 15^th Century. Around the time of 1450, the professional card makers, Ulm, Nuremberg and Augsburg produced the first printed cards. They would be coloured after printing, either by hand or with stencils.

The four suits now changed to what we know today as Clubs, Spades, Diamonds, and Hearts, originating in France. It is thought that the Club came from the acorn and the Spade from the leaf used in the German suits. At this time, the picture cards changed to represent the Royalty and Attendants.

But guess what? When the French Revolution happened, these picture cards changed to get rid of the royalty. Kings – Liberties,…Queens – Equalities…..Jacks – Fraternities. 

Chinese Money Suit Cards

The Americans introduced the Jokers to the cards, as they played a really popular game called ‘Euchre’. This game had come to the USA from Europe after the American Revolutionary War in the 19^th Century. In Euchre, the highest trump card is the Jack of the Trump suit, so they needed the Joker as a third Trump card. 

There is a popular legend that states the makeup of a deck of cards has mystical, astrological and religious significance.

If you think of the 13 cards of each suit as the 13 lunar months of the Earth Year. Since the sidereal lunar month may be thought of as 28 days, then each deck of cards is equal to the 364 days of the year.

In the same way, the 52 cards of a whole deck represent a whole year, and the 4 suits are the four seasons. The Ace is symbolic for the ‘Beginning and the End’. I like this idea. Interesting, as some Fortune Tellers use a deck of cards to give their readings. 

Anyway, now the next time you get out your cards to have a game with friends, you will be able to tell them a little of the history of a deck of cards.  

Jo Tempest.

The Cheat with the Ace of Clubs-1630

We Love Coffee

All around the world today, people can not start their day without a good cup of coffee. Whether it’s a cafetiere at home or a Starbucks takeaway, coffee is what they want.

And this love of coffee has been with us for many centuries, but how did it start and where? 

Iibrik

Well, way back in 600 AD, in Mecca, and Cairo, Egypt, a brew of weak coffee was made from the un-roasted berries of the coffee plant in an Ibrik.

Many of hundred years later, the famous Arabian physician, Rhazed, wrote about coffee in his medical encyclopedia referring to it as Bunchum.

Much later, the first coffee plants were cultivated on the Arabian peninsula when the Arab traders brought coffee beans back to their homelands.

The Arabs would enjoy the drink they named Qahwa, (it means “preventing sleep”), by crushing the green coffee beans and putting them in boiling water to produce the drink. Later, they found that if they roasted the coffee beans first, they made a much better flavour. 

One hundred years later, coffee arrived in Turkey, and this was how my interest was piqued as I am living in this country at the moment.

This was the first country where the dried bean hulls and the beans were roasted in stone dishes over an open fire. The roasted beans were then crushed, placed in boiling water, and drunk with the crushed grounds of coffee.

Qahueh Kaneh

Many coffee houses, known as Qahueh Kaneh, sprang up in Arabian villages and men would enjoy drinking coffee as well as playing games such as backgammon.

But local rulers did not like the idea of these coffee houses, seeing them as a threat, and so tried to impose restrictions on there use. They were ignored and their numbers continued to grow, as well as the numbers of  people drinking coffee in their homes.

As the popularity of coffee grew, the first coffee pots appeared in Persia, Turkey and Egypt, made from crafted pottery to serve the people. 

At this time, Ethiopia was the main source of the coffee beans but plants were smuggled from there and brought back to what is known today as Yemen. They were successfully planted and produced good crops of coffee beans.

A spice grinder that had been invented here, was found to also be great at grinding up the coffee beans after they had been roasted over large braziers of coals.

The Turkish were exceptionally proficient at this technique and when the Ottoman Turks brought coffee to Constantinople, they would add spices of cloves, anise, cinnamon, and cardamom to their brew.

The first ever coffee shop opened in Constantinople around 1475, opened by the Ottoman Turks and they called it Kiva Han. Coffee was so important around this time that there was an amazing Turkish law allowing a wife to divorce her husband if he did not provide enough coffee on a daily basis! Needless to say, that law soon disappeared.

At the beginning of the next century, the corrupt governor of Mecca, Khair Bey, wanted to ban coffee as he was worried it would encourage rebels against his rule. He also thought it would stop the men going to the mosques to pray, instead spending time in the coffee houses.

For a week, all the coffee houses in Constantinople were shut down until the Sultan of Cairo ordered the execution of Khair Bey and declared coffee as sacred. The execution went ahead and everyone got back to drinking their wonderful coffee. 

Over the next few years, coffee drinking bans were tried in Turkey, with sentences of being beaten on the first time of being caught, and on the second, the poor man was sewn into an animal skin and thrown into the Bhosphorus strait.

Religious fanatics tried to stop the growth of the coffee houses and sales of coffee, but it was too late. Coffee had taken its hold on the public and they were not going to stop drinking it! 

Coffee Beans

Coffee spread from the Muslim countries into Italy and later Europe, with the same welcome. Everyone loved the taste and wanted more. The Dutch took it to the East Indies and the Americas, and as we say, the rest is history. 

So, the next time you are making your coffee at home or picking up your favourite brew from Starbucks, just take a moment to think about how it got to you.

Jo Tempest.

Valentines Day Origin

Valentine’s Day has been celebrated for hundreds of years and is the second most celebrated day after New Year. But where did it come from?

Well, it actually has quite a macabre history. It’s thought it came from the martyrdom of Saint Valentinus who was imprisoned for ministering to Christians persecuted under the Roman Empire.

He also performed weddings for soldiers who were often forbidden to marry, as it was thought that single men made better soldiers! While Valentinus was in prison, it was proclaimed that he helped his jailer, Asterius, by restoring his daughter’s sight.

The legend states that just before his execution on February 14^th , he sent a farewell written note to the daughter signed ‘from your Valentine’. 

Also, around this time, the Romans celebrated the ‘Feast of Lupercalia’ on 15^th February, in honor of a goddess. The young Roman men would randomly pick a female name and escort the girl with the chosen name to the festivities. (I am sure it wasn’t quite as random as it was meant to be!). Once Christianity took its hold, the day was moved to February 14^th, as they already celebrated Saint Valentinus on that day. 

By the 15^th Century, the day had evolved into a day to send special love cards, known as Valentines, as well as chocolates and flowers, and the rest is history, as they say.

Now, there is also the tradition of sending anonymous Valentine cards to potential boy or girlfriends, and I can still remember receiving them when I was a teenager.

In fact, I can still recall one I received anonymously when I was around 16 years old. It said “ Meet me at the gate at eight, and we will have a date”. I was so impressed I went on the date! 

Anyway, I hope you enjoy your Valentine’s Day and are really inundated with beautiful cards, flowers and chocolates.

Jo Tempest. 

Girolamo Savonarola

I am sure you have probably heard of the film called ‘Bonfire of the Vanities,’ based on the book by the same name written by Tom Wolfe, both really good. But do you know where the phrase originated from? 

Well, it dates back to the fifteenth century in Italy, Florence to be precise. This was a wonderfully prolific time for writers, artists and sculptors but not everyone appreciated the art at that time.

There was a Dominican priest called Girolamo Savonarola who saw much of the writing and art as ‘Sinful’. Girolamo was born in 1452 to a noble family in Ferrara, Italy. When he was just 22 years old, he entered a Dominican order in Bologna and six years later he was preaching in Florence on the sins of art.

Fortunately, he was not well-received and soon packed off to Brescia where unfortunately, he perfected his preaching and in 1489, he was back in Florence. Sadly, he managed to collect a following for his sermons and soon lots of manuscripts, paintings and sculptures were seen as – maybe they could lead people to sin. If you think about it, both the art and the sculptures at that time were often barely clothed figures. 

Anyway, our zealous Girolamo decided to hold a ‘Bonfire of the Vanities’ on the 7^th February 1497. It wasn’t the first, but it was the largest ever seen in Italy. His followers went into the beautiful homes of Florence and took mirrors, make-up, exquisite gowns, manuscripts, playing cards, paintings, sculptures and even musical instruments.

They were all put on a huge fire and destroyed. Can you imagine what wonderful art was destroyed on that day? It has even been rumored that Botticelli added some of his own work, as he was a follower of Girolamo at that time, but fortunately he came to his senses. 

There was a huge outcry against this devastating ‘Bonfire’ and within a year, Girolamo found himself on trial for ‘Religious Error and Sedition’. After being tortured, he was found guilty and some would say he had a befitting death. On 23^rd May 1498, he and two of his Dominican disciples were hung and then put on a bonfire!  

So, now you know the origin of ‘Bonfire of the Vanities’.

Jo Tempest.